Repro Alert

Celebrity Style and Outfits
PROJECT FIA Episode 6: CELEBRITY

PROJECT FIA Episode 6: CELEBRITY


♪ [bones knocking around] [Narrator Voice Over] [bones collapse] ♪ [rising tension] [heavy whoosh] RebelZen:
WHAT IN THE HOLY HELL IS THAT? OH ME? OH, IT’S ONE OF MY FANS. THAT AIN’T A FAN. IT IS. NO, NO, THAT’S NOT A FAN. IT’S NOT A FAN. IT’S ONE OF MY FANS. JUST BECAUSE YOURS ARE ALL UNDEAD… MINE ARE A LITTLE BIT COOLER THAN THAT. MINE ARE HALF-DEAD. AND THEY’RE NOT ANYTHING LIKE THAT. YEAH. LIKE I SAID,
MINE ARE COOL, YOURS ARE… WHATEVER THEY ARE. DOES IT ACTUALLY BITE, THOUGH? IF YOU GET TOO CLOSE, IT DOES. BUT AS LONG AS THEY’VE GOT THEIR MASK ON,
THIS METAL THINGY, THEN THEY’RE FINE. ALRIGHT. WHATEVER. IT’S A BIT WINDY, THOUGH, ISN’T IT? IF IT ANNOYS YOU, I’LL GET RID OF IT. YEAH. RebelZen: YEAH IT DOES, YEAH. SEE THAT? YOU CAN HEAR NOW. IT’S VERY PEACEFUL. AND I’M LOOKING AT MY BOOK. BUT IT’S GOT WORDS,
AND YOU CAN’T READ. IT’S, UH… IT’S PICTURES. OH! SO IT’S LIKE A FILM, BUT IT DOESN’T MOVE? IS THAT RIGHT? WELL… I MEAN… KIND OF. BUT IT’S A BIT MORE SKETCHY. OH, I SEE WHAT YOU MEAN, YEAH. STORY’S REALLY DRAWN OUT, THOUGH. YEAH, LOOKS IT.
I CAN SEE FROM HERE. IT’S QUITE EPIC. I THINK. SO THERE’S THIS BUILDING THERE,
AND THERE’S PEOPLE… ANYWAY ENOUGH OF THIS, IT’S A BIT ANTISOCIAL
TO READ IN FRONT OF YOU WHICH I’M NOT DOING,
‘COS I CAN’T. I’M JUST LOOKING AT PICTURES,
AS I SAID. SO, UH… HOW YOU DOING? NOT TOO BAD. JUST BEEN
CHILLING OUT WITH MY FANS BUT YOU’VE SPOILT
ALL THAT, THOUGH, SO… WE’RE GONNA HAVE TO DO SOMETHING, I SUPPOSE. LIKE… TOGETHER? WELL, WE HAVE GOT SOMETHING
THAT WE GOTTA DO. BUT WE’RE NOT GONNA
TELL URBO JUST YET. IN FACT, WE’VE PUT HIM
ON THE PHONE TO AN AGENT. WHICH, I DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT IS.
D’YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS? YEAH, YEAH, I’VE GOT AN AGENT.
HAVE YOU NOT GOT AN AGENT? NO. NO, I HAVEN’T. I DID USE A CLEANING AGENT ONCE. IS THAT THE SAME THING? I DON’T THINK SO…? I MEAN, IT’S LIKE… WHAT KIND OF CELEBRITY ARE YOU? AN AGENT IS SOMEBODY WHO YOU PAY, AND THEY GET YOU, LIKE,
GIGS AND STUFF. I’M GREAT FOR KID’S PARTIES, AND WEDDINGS, AND FUNERALS,
AND THAT KINDA THING. PEOPLE WANT TO SEE UNICORNS DIE? YEAH. THEY LOVE IT. ESPECIALLY AT FUNERALS.
GOES DOWN REALLY WELL. IT’S LIKE A SACRIFICE. ALRIGHT. FAIR ENOUGH. SO, I GUESS… DO THEY HAVE TO TALK TO
YOUR AGENT TO BOOK YOU? YEAH, YOU TALK TO… NOBODY TALKS TO ME, COME ON. I’M BETTER THAN THAT. DID YOU HEAR SOMEONE
JUST GOT SHOT OUTSIDE? IT’S A NICE LITTLE PLACE WE’RE IN. IT’S EITHER SOMEONE GOT SHOT,
OR THEY THREW A BODY OFF THE ROOF. I’M PRETTY SURE THAT’S WHAT HAPPENED. IT SOUNDED LIKE IT, BUT YOU NEVER
KNOW WITH THESE PEOPLE, DO YOU? THIS IS THE REALM OF THE, UH, FORMLESS FEW, ISN’T IT? WHAT’RE YOU WAITING FOR, ANYWAY? WELL APPARENTLY, I JUST GOTTA WAIT UNTIL CHRISTMAS
FOR SOMETHING TO HAPPEN BECAUSE THIS IS TAKING FOREVER! [UrbanOracle sighs] YEAH. TAKING FOR-EEEVER! HM?! FOREVER! HOW’S IT GOING? YEAH, SORRY, IT’S NOT MY FAULT.
THESE PEOPLE, THEY KEEP RUNNING
ME IN CIRCLES… I’M ON THE PHONE WITH HIS AGENT. WELL, THEY SAID THEY
WERE AN ‘ESTATE AGENT’ I’M NOT SURE IF YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS? NO? BUT ANYWAY, I’M ON THE
PHONE WITH THEM NOW, THEY SAID TO CHECK OUT A FEW PLACES,
BUT I’M JUST TRYING TO GET A LITTLE BIT
MORE INFORMATION ABOUT HIM. SO, YEAH. HOW LONG’S IT GONNA TAKE? I’M ON HOLD RIGHT NOW,I DON’T
KNOW HOW LONG THEY’RE GONNA BE… OH WAIT, THEY’VE COME BACK. SO, CHRISTMAS.
CHRISTMAS IS FUN. WE WENT TO CHRISTMAS EARLIER, DIDN’T WE? YEAH YEAH, WE’VE BEEN A FEW TIMES, HAVEN’T WE? WE HAVE BEEN TO CHRISTMAS QUITE A LOT,
BUT THERE’S THIS ONE PLACE IN PARTICULAR
THAT I THOUGHT WAS GREAT ABOUT CHRISTMAS. WHICH ONE’S THAT THEN? THE ONE WHERE IT’S JUST STUCK IN A SHOP. YEAH, STRANGE, WASN’T IT? NO, THAT’S WHERE I THINK CHRISTMAS
BELONGS. STUCK IN A SHOP. I COULD GO WITH THAT. TO BE FAIR, I’M A DICTATOR SO
I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT. IF YOU WANT CHRISTMAS STUCK IN A SHOP,
I’LL GET YOU CHRISTMAS STUCK IN A SHOP. IS THAT WHY YOU’VE GOT
YOUR DICTATOR’S HAT ON? EXACTLY. FAMOUS DICTATOR
RIGHT THERE. D’YOU KNOW ANY
FAMOUS DICTATORS? UM, THERE’S A COUPLE IN THIS REALM, ISN’T THERE?
STEVEN SPIELBERG YEAH, HE’S A FAMOUS DICTATOR. ANYONE ELSE? UH, QUENTIN TARANTINO? QU-HEN-EN-TA-WHO? YOU KNOW. QUENTIN TARANTINO. QU-WA-HEN-TIN
TA-HEE-HEENU HOO? HE’S THE ONE THAT’S SCARED OF ALL THE BLOOD. A DICATATOR THAT’S SCARED OF BLOOD? YEAH. IT’S UNUSUAL, BUT WORKS FOR HIM, APPARENTLY. THAT’S CRAZY. I KNOW CHRIS NOLAN’S A FAMOUS DICTATOR. YEAH, THAT’S ANOTHER ONE, YEAH. HE DID MAN-BAT. HE DID WHA-? ‘MAN-BAT’! IS THAT LIKE, BATMAN,
BUT DOWN UNDER? WELL, HE CALLED IT THE DARK KNIGHT, BUT ALL NIGHT’S DARK, ISN’T IT? IT’S NOT IF YOU COME FROM
WHERE I COME FROM, ‘COS THOSE UNICORNS ARE
HAVING PARTIES ALL THE TIME. IS THAT WHY YOU KILL THEM? YEAH. EXACTLY.
KEEPS ME UP AT NIGHT. THAT’S IT. YOU CAN’T HAVE A DICTATOR AND
LOADS OF UNICORNS WITH PARTIES,
CAN YOU, REALLY? ‘COS IT’S A ONE PARTY SYSTEM
THAT YOU LIVE IN. CORRECT. AND THAT ONE PARTY’S MY PARTY. HM. I’M NOT SURE IF DICTATOR’S
THE RIGHT WORD, ANYWAY. IS IT THE RIGHT WORD? IT’S NOT ONE I USE OFTEN, BUT… WHAT DO YOU PREFER? I’M TRYING TO THINK OF
A FEW ALTERNATIVES, LIKE, ‘BENEVOLENT LEADER’. THAT KIND OF THING. YOU ARE DEFINITELY A BENE- BUH- BUH- WHAT? HOW D’YA SAY THAT? ‘BANANA LEADER’. YOU ARE DEFINITELY A BANANA LEADER. YEAH. THANK YOU. YOU LEAD A LOTTA BANANAS. YEAH. YOU WOULD SAY YOU ARE BANANAS? I AM BANANAS.
COMPLETELY BANANAS. ‘BENEVOLENCE’ I DON’T GET IT. SO ARE YOU DONE YET? YOU DONE? YES, WE’RE DONE NOW. WHA-? NO, YOU DON’T NEED TO CALL
THE POLICE, NO IT’S FINE, OKAY OKAY… BYE- BYE- BYE THE WHAT? SO THEY VERY RUDELY TOLD ME THAT 
I HAD TO COME OFF THE PHONE SO I’M NOT HAPPY ABOUT THAT, BUT ANYWAY THEY SAID THAT WE CAN GO
TO OUR CELEBRITY’S BIRTHPLACE THAT’LL BE A GOOD PLACE TO FIND HIM, AND IF NOT, THEN WE CAN GO TO
THE PLACES WHERE HE HANGS OUT. MAYBE THAT’LL BE GOOD TO LOOK AT. ‘BIRTHPLACE’? IS THAT LIKE,
WHERE HE HATCHED FROM? I THINK SO. I DON’T REMEMBER MY
HATCHING MUCH. APPARENTLY
JUST LOADS OF LIGHT AND SPARKLES
AND STUFF LIKE THAT. HOW ‘BOUT YOURS? NAH, OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD
I CAN’T REALLY REMEMBER. I DO KNOW THERE WAS
A STORM AT THE TIME. OH, DID THE NURSES IN THE
ASYLUM TELL YOU THAT? THE WHAT? UH, FORGET I MENTIONED IT.
NOTHING. IT’S FINE. SO, ANYWAY… SHALL WE… OH SORRY, I WAS JUST REMINDED OF LONG TIME AGO, IN THE ASYLUM.
‘COS YOU BROUGHT IT UP. YEAH, IT’S A TOUGH LIFE.
SO, UH… WHERE AND HOW AND
WHAT DO WE DO NOW? OKAY. BEST THING TO DO IS TO GO
TO HIS BIRTHPLACE, FIRST OF ALL AND ONCE WE’RE THERE, WE’LL HAVE
A LOOK AROUND, SEE IF WE CAN FIND HIM, AND IF NOT, THEN WE GO TO HIS HANGOUT,
ASK AROUND, SEE IF WE CAN FIND HIM THERE. THAT’S THE ONLY WAY THAT I CAN THINK OF. WE NEED A WAY OF GETTING THERE, SO… YOU GOT ANY SUGGESTIONS? WELL, USUALLY… YOU’D PRETTY MUCH USE
THE DOOR, WOULDN’T YA? USUALLY. BUT I THINK, ‘COS WE WANT TO BE SPECIAL, YOU SHOULD GO IN THERE,
THAT WOODEN BOX. OH YEAH, RIGHT! I CAN CREATE A PORTAL THERE,
AND THEN I’LL BE ABLE TO MAKE IT
TO THE AREA WE NEED TO GO TO! YEAH, YEAH, WHATEVER YOU’RE SAYING. BUT YOU SHOULD GO FIRST,
‘COS YOU KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING. AS LONG AS YOU GUYS ARE COMING IN
STRAIGHT AFTER ME, RIGHT? THAT’S WHAT I LIKE TO HEAR. COME ON, THEN! WE’LL BE RIGHT… RIGHT BEHIND YA, WON’T WE? UnicornSlayer:
RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT BEHIND YA. RebelZen:
SO RIGHT, IT’S LEFT. UnicornSlayer:
GONNA BE LEFT BEHIND YA. RIGHT. PUTTING THE
COORDINATES IN NOW. RebelZen:
WHAT? I DON’T SPEAK URBO TALK. UnicornSlayer: [whispering]
I HAVEN’T GOT A CLUE.
JUST LEAVE HIM TO IT. RebelZen:
AWESOME. AW, THAT LOOKS SO ROOMY! YOU’RE
GONNA HAVE A LOTTA FUN IN THERE,
URBO, GO ON, GO ON, GO ON… [wardrobe door shuts] ALRIGHT, SO, WE’RE OBVIOUSLY
NOT GONNA DO THAT, ARE WE? NO, WE’RE GOING TO GO OUT
THERE, LIKE A NORMAL PERSON. YEAH. PRETTY MUCH.
USE THE DOOR, THE STANDARD DOOR. BUT I HAVE TO SAY, I’M GETTING
AWFULLY ATTACHED TO THIS ROOM.
IT’S A BIT LIKE BACTERIA, ISN’T IT? YEAH, YEAH, IT IS. BUT UM, YOU REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED
LAST TIME WE USED THE DOORS? WELL, THAT WAS…
SPECIAL CIRCUMSTANCES, I’M SURE
IT’S ALL BEEN FIXED SINCE THEN. PLUS, URBO’S NOT WITH US, SO I’M SURE IT’LL WORK FINE. SO ANYWAY… FOR THE PEOPLE AT HOME, YOU’RE
PROBABLY THINKING WHAT THE HELL
IS THIS ALL ABOUT TODAY… WE’RE DOING THIS AMAZING THING,
WHERE WE’RE TRYING TO FIND OUR
FIRST, EVER– APART FROM OURSELVES– CELEBRITY! ARE YOU EXCITED? I CAN’T WAIT. CAN YOU NOT? WELL, I CAN. SEE? YOU JUST WAITED. YOU WAITED FOR ME TO SAY THE NEXT THING. HAHAHA YOU CAN WAIT. I’M SICK OF WAITING FOR YOU. WELL, YOU ARE MY PRIVATE BUTLER. SO… ANYWAY! SO WE’VE GOT TO FIND
OUR CELEBRITY, ‘COS WE NEED HIM… I THINK IT’S A ‘HIM’. …I THINK SO. …THINK IT’S A ‘HIM’. WE NEED HIM TO WRITE OUR BIOPIC! ‘COS WE’RE PLANNING
AN AMAZING BIOPIC ABOUT US! RIGHT? NOT ABOUT URBO. US. YOU AND ME. WELL, YOU CAN’T READ OR WRITE, AND I’VE GOT BETTER THINGS TO DO. IF IT WAS JUST ABOUT ME, THEN
SURE, I’D SIT DOWN AND DO IT BUT IF YOU’RE GONNA BE IN IT AS WELL, GET SOMEBODY ELSE TO DO IT.
I’VE HEARD THEY’RE GOOD. I WAS GONNA NOMINATE YOU
AS THE DICTATOR OF THE FILM ‘COS YOU’VE GOT YOUR
DICATATOR’S HAT ON. INDEED. YOU OKAY WITH THAT? YEAH, FINE BY ME. I WAS JUST GONNA BE THE SILENT PRODUCER. MEANING… I’M NOT THERE, I’M NOT PRESENT,
I JUST TAKE ALL THE MONEY AFTERWARDS. UH… WE’LL SIT DOWN AND TALK
ABOUT THAT A BIT LATER, YEAH? WELL WE CAN, BUT I ACTUALLY
DON’T KNOW WHAT MONEY IS SO I’M JUST REALLY HAPPY
ABOUT FINDING A CELEBRITY BECAUSE I’M GONNA EXTORT THEM
FOR ALL THEY’VE GOT. AND THEN SOME. SO, WE’D BEST GET OFF NOW… SO, AFTER YOU. WHY ME FIRST? SLAYERS GO FIRST.
YOU KNOW THAT, IT’S THE RULE. YEAH. I’LL GO WITH THAT. OFF YOU GO THEN. SO WE’LL SEE YOU VERY SOON OF THE STREETS OF AN UNKNOWN PLACE IN THE LAND OF THE… WELL… WE DON’T KNOW WHAT
TO CALL THEM, BUT THEY’RE THE ‘FORMLESS FEW’. SO SEE YA LATER, BYE-BYE! [door opens] [door shuts] [cupboard door opens] GUYS…? GUYS! WHA…? I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE GONNA BE
RIGHT BEHIND ME! WHAT HAPPENED? BLOODY HELL,
I’LL MEET ‘EM THERE. [sigh] [cupboard door shuts] RebZ:
SO, WELCOME TO FIA– SHUT UP!
[Urbo laughs] WELCOME TO FIA… SORRY. I DIDN’T MEAN TO SAY THAT.
THAT WAS QUITE HARSH. WE’RE OUTSIDE… WE’VE BEEN
OUTSIDE FOR QUITE A WHILE. WE’RE WAITING FOR OUR CELEBRITY. HE’S NOT IN RIGHT NOW.
IN FACT, NO ONE IS. BEEN WAITING FOR AT LEAST… HOW LONG? ‘BOUT 5 MINUTES?
IT’S BEEN AGES. IT HAS BEEN A WHILE. A GOOD CHUNK OF OUR
TIME IS JUST WAITING HERE. IT HASN’T BEEN 5 MINUTES,
IT’S BEEN MORE LIKE 5 SECONDS BETWEEN THE FIRST TAKE AND THIS TAKE. 5 MINUTES, 5 SECONDS,
WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE? GOOD…QUESTION. I HAVEN’T GOT AN ANSWER FOR THAT. SO, UH… DID YOU THINK ABOUT KNOCKING? I MEAN, I TRIED TO, BUT I
COULDN’T REACH THE BOARD. I MEAN, FOR SOME REASON THERE’S A GATE
IN FRONT OF THE HOUSE. I DUNNO WHY. THAT’S BECAUSE IT’S A VIP-ONLY ACCESS,
OBVIOUSLY… THIS IS A CELEBRITY. Urbo:
AH, OKAY. RebZ:
WE ARE CELEBRITIES TOO, AREN’T WE? WHAT? GOT A QUESTION? I WAS JUST GONNA SAY AREN’T WE
CELEBRITIES AS WELL, SO SHOULDN’T
WE BE ABLE TO JUST GO IN? WELL, YOU’RE A VERY FAMOUS
DIRECTOR, AREN’T YOU? HENCE THE… YEAH, HE IS FAMOUS. [USlay whispers]
IT’S ME! THE UNICORN SLAYER! I’M IN DISGUISE! SHH… RebZ:
OH YEAH, YOU’RE BEING INCOGNITO. WHAT DOES THAT ACTUALLY MEAN?
I DON’T KNOW. UM… SO YEAH, WE’RE WAITING…
I’M SURE HE’LL TURN UP EVENTUALLY. BUT ANYWAY, IT’S TYPICAL. THE AGENT TOLD US TO BE HERE, RIGHT? THIS IS WHERE HE TOLD US TO BE? HE DID, YEAH, THAT’S WHAT YOU TOLD US. YOU GOT THE PHONE CALL. WE JUST WANT TO MEET
A CELEBRITY, REALLY. BUT WE NEED HIM TO
WRITE OUR FILM, DON’T WE? YEAH, BECAUSE WE’RE NOT VERY GOOD
AT THAT KIND OF THING, ARE WE? I MEAN, YOU CAN’T EVEN READ,
LET ALONE WRITE. CORRECT. THERE’S NOTHING RIGHT ABOUT ME. HOW ABOUT YOURSELF? I MEAN, I’M PRETTY SURE I CAN
MAKE HIS ENTIRE WORK ON MY PHONE, SO…
WHY DO WE NEED HIM AGAIN? WELL, MOSTLY BECAUSE
WE WANT TO EXTORT HIM. AH. I OBVIOUSLY DON’T LIKE CELEBRITIES. EXCEPT FOR YOU. AND YOU, OBVIOUSLY. AND MYSELF. I JUST DON’T LIKE CELEBRITIES
FROM THE MORTAL REALM. THERE’S NOTHING FUN ABOUT THE MORTAL REALM. ESPECIALLY… HOW IT’S ALWAYS RAINING. UGH. WHERE’S THE PALM TREES? AND THE SUNSHINE? WE WERE PROMISED THIS. I THINK WE MIGHT HAVE
GOT ON THE WRONG PLANE. OF EXISTENCE? ‘COS I DON’T KNOW WHAT A PLANE IS. YOU KNOW WHAT A PLANE IS, DON’T YOU? UH… I’M PRETTY SURE IT’S A FLYING THING. I’VE NO IDEA. NO. SORRY. I THOUGHT YOU’D BEEN ON ONE
IN THE FIRST EPISODE. ANYWAY, MOVING ON. WE SHOULD GO THAT WAY. I JUST FEEL GOOD ABOUT THAT WAY. IT’S BETTER THAN THAT WAY. THERE’S ALWAYS THAT WAY, BUT
NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT, DO THEY?
NAH. SO WE SHOULD GO THAT WAY. AFTER YOU. ALRIGHT, NOW HE’S GONE, SORRY, WHAT? SHALL WE GO THAT WAY? YEAH, WE SHOULD. SEE YA. [RebZ hums] HM. IT’S GETTING DARK QUITE
QUICKLY, ISN’T IT? IT IS A BIT, ISN’T IT?
WE NEED SOME ILLUMINATION. WE DO. GOT ANY BRIGHT IDEAS? THERE’S NONE AROUND HERE. JUST NOT COMING TO ME, I’M AFRAID. HM. I’VE HAD ONE. LET’S GO THIS WAY. RebZ:
OH, OKAY. THIS IS GOOD,
THIS IS GOOD. ALRIGHT URBO, HOW YOU DOING?
WHO’S YOUR FRIEND HERE? I’M NOT SURE, BUT HE LOOKS LIKE HE’S HAVING QUITE A HARD TIME.
HE’S GOT A LOT ON HIS MIND, YOU SEE. YEAH. JUST HELPING HIM THROUGH IT. SHALL WE TALK TO HIM? D’YOU KNOW WHERE
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE IS? Urbo:
HE’S A BIT SHY, YOU SEE. RebZ:
ERM… MAYBE THAT, OR WE JUST
CAN’T HEAR HIS LANGUAGE. MAYBE IT’S LIKE A
SUBLIMINAL LANGUAGE. HEY! IT’S THE SECOND PART OF MY FACE! THAT’S THE BETTER PART, ISN’T IT? RebZ:
YES, YEAH IT IS, REALLY, TRULY… [sarcastic sigh] ANYWAY, SO YOU DON’T KNOW
WHERE SHAKESPEARE IS? HM. MAYBE THEY KNOW OVER THERE. WHAT D’YOU RECKON?
SHALL WE TRY AND ASK THEM? OKAY. WHAT WE’LL DO IS WE’RE GONNA TALK TO PEOPLE
AROUND HERE FOR JUST A BIT. UH, OBVIOUSLY… HE LOOKS A BIT MISERABLE, DOESN’T HE? ERM… OKAY. SO LET’S GO AND TALK
TO SOMEONE ELSE. RebZ:
OFF WE GO, LA-LA-LA-LA… SO… OH, YOU’RE QUITE TALL, AREN’T YOU? D’YOU KNOW ABOUT WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE? I DON’T GET THIS. WHY… WHY AREN’T YOU TALKING TO US? IN FACT, WHY’RE YOU
LOOKING OVER THERE? MAYBE THAT’S A CLUE, GUYS! Urbo:
LET ME TRY THIS. MY FAIR LADY WHEREFORE ART THOU WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE? SEE IF THAT WORKS. RebZ:
WHAT’S HE GOING ON ABOUT? USlay:
I’VE GOT NO IDEA. DOES HE SPEAK
THEIR LANGUAGE, D’YOU THINK? RebZ:
I DON’T THINK…
D’YOU SPEAK LANGUAGE? Urbo:
I DON’T SPEAK LANGUAGE, NO. BUT I’M TRYING TO COMMUNICATE
WITH HER, YOU SEE. SHE’S RESPONDING A LITTLE BIT,
IF YOU GIVE HER SOME TIME. RebZ:
I JUST THINK SHE’S GIVING US
A CLUE BY LOOKING OVER THERE. WHAT D’YA RECKON? USlay:
I THINK SHE’S HAD A BRIGHT IDEA, MYSELF. RebZ:
OH YEAH, THERE’S ANOTHER ONE THERE, LOOK! IT’S UH… HUH. Urbo:
I THINK SHE’S HURT HER ARM, SO… IF WE FIX HER ARM, MAYBE SHE’LL
POINT US IN THE DIRECTION OF
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE. RebZ:
I THINK SHE LOST HER SHOES,
TO BE HONEST. Urbo:
AH. THAT’S WHAT IT IS. SHE’S COLD! WE COULD WARM HER UP… USlay:
I THINK SHE’S LOST HER EYES AS WELL. RebZ:
AYE AYE. ANYWAY, WE SHOULD TALK TO
THAT GUY OVER THERE. LA-LA-LA… INTERMISSION MUSIC! BLA-BLA-LA-LA… DUM-DE-DUM-DE-DUM… RebZ:
IS IT RUDE TO LOOK IN SOMEONE’S CUP? USlay:
LITTLE BIT. RebZ:
HM. SORRY ABOUT THAT. SO, D’YOU KNOW ABOUT
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE? WE’RE NOT HAVING
MUCH LUCK, YOU KNOW. NOT MUCH LUCK AT ALL
WITH PEOPLE… WHAT? IS THAT ANOTHER CLUE?
‘COS HE’S POINTING THAT WAY. RebZ:
HE IS! HE’S SAYING HE’S SKYWARDS. APPARENTLY. IS THAT RIGHT?
IS THAT WHAT YOU’RE SAYING TO US? RebZ:
CAN YOU SEE IF YOU CAN TALK TO HIM? Urbo:
I MEAN, MAYBE HE’S SAYING
THAT WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE’S… NAH. NEVER MIND. HE’S GOTTA
BE AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE. MAYBE YOU SHOULD SPILL HIS DRINK. THAT’S WHAT I WAS LOOKING AT EARLIER,
BUT I WAS TOLD IT WAS RUDE. WHAT’S HIS NAME? USlay:
FAL… FALSTAFF. RebZ:
OH! OH! THIS IS A GUY THAT’S PRETENDING
TO WORK FOR SHAKESPEARE, ISN’T IT? LIKE, HE WORKS AT HIS HOUSE BUT HE’S
NOT THE REAL STAFF, HE’S THE FALSE STAFF. THAT’S THE ONE! THIS ONE ISN’T HIS AGENT, IS IT? NO, NO, URBO TALKED TO
HIS AGENT, DIDN’T YA? YEAH, I DEFINITELY SPOKE TO HIM, AND
HE’S NOT BEING VERY RESPONSIVE RIGHT NOW, SO I’M NOT QUITE SURE WHAT’S GOING ON. D’YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK IT IS, GUYS? I THINK THEY’RE ALL STARSTRUCK. BY US? OF COURSE! I MEAN,
WE ARE CELEBRITIES. SO THEY’RE OBVIOUSLY JUST NOT ABLE
TO MOVE IN OUR PRESENCE. IT’S OKAY! IF YOU WANT AN AUTOGRAPH, JUST ASK! ONLY, I CAN’T WRITE. OR READ. SO IT’LL PROBABLY JUST BE A SCRIBBLE. I CAN SEND YOU A DIGITAL PICTURE
ON MY APP, IF THAT HELPS. NAH, THEY’RE DEFINITELY STARSTRUCK. WE’RE GONNA HAVE TO FIND SOME OF
THE OTHER FACELESS FORMLESS… ‘COS WE REALLY NEED HELP.
I DO NOT KNOW WHERE SHAKESPEARE IS. HAVEN’T GOT A CLUE. WE COULD BE SEARCHING THE WHOLE
GLOBE FOR SHAKESPEARE, COULDN’T WE? WE COULD BE SEARCHING THE WHOLE GLOBE. THEATRE, THAT IS. SO, WHERE TO NEXT, URBO? UH… I MEAN, THERE’S ONLY ONE MORE. LET’S GO SEE WHAT THIS GUY HAS TO SAY. MIGHT AS WELL. Urbo:
OKAY, I GOT IT, I GOT IT. SO, THIS GUY HAD TO HAVE BEEN A
KING OF SOME SORT? I MEAN, JUDGING BY HIS CROWN…
SO HE HAS TO KNOW WHERE
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE IS. NAH, I THINK THIS GUY IS THE GUY
THAT PUTS THE CROWN ONTO KINGS. IN THAT CASE, WHY ISN’T HE GIVING IT TO ME? HEY! COME ON! NAH, HE’S NOT HAVING IT EITHER. RebZ:
WHAT’S HIS NAME? Urbo:
‘PRINCE HAL’? SO HE WAS PART OF THE MONARCHY. SO HE REALLY SHOULD KNOW WHERE HE IS. TRY ASKING HIM. RebZ:
ALRIGHT. I’M SORRY, MR PERSON-WITH-
THE-CROWN-IN-YOUR-HANDS, BUT D’YOU KNOW WHERE SHAKESPEARE IS,
‘COS WE’RE LOOKING FOR HIM TO WRITE A FILM FOR US. NAH. NAH, WE’RE NOT GONNA HAVE ANY JOY HERE. [RebZ sighs] MOVING ON. I ACTUALLY THINK THE LADY
WAS TRYING TO GIVE US A CLUE, GOING THAT WAY.
WHAT D’YA RECKON? USlay:
I CAN’T SEE ANYTHING THAT WAY. RebZ:
I DON’T THINK WE’RE MEANT TO SEE IT.
I THINK IT REVEALS ITSELF. USlay:
WHAT, LIKE A QUEST? RebZ:
EXACTLY. THAT’S WHAT THIS IS. A QUEST
TO FIND A CELEBRITY APART FROM OURSELVES. USlay:
YEAH. RebZ:
SO LET’S GO… THAT WAY. Urbo:
I’M NOT DOING ANYTHING ELSE UNTIL
I CAN GUARANTEE I’M GETTING SOME
QUEST REWARDS HERE. I NEED SOME EXPERIENCE, I NEED SOME GOLD,
I NEED SOME THINGS TO PROGRESS ME IN THIS. RebZ:
WELL, WHERE WOULD YOU SUGGEST
WE GO TO DO ALL OF THAT? Urbo:
UH… WHENEVER WE COMPLETE THIS QUEST,
WE SHOULD JUST GET IT GIVEN TO US
BY SOMETHING OR SOMEBODY. RebZ:
UNDERSTOOD. BUT WHERE DO WE GO NOW? Urbo:
THAT WAY? RebZ:
THAT’S KINDA WHAT I SAID, ISN’T IT? USlay:
YEAH. COME ON. RebZ:
DON’T BARGE THROUGH. ♪ electro swing
[Piccolo and a Cane by TeknoAXE] ♪electro swing
[Piccolo and a Cane by TeknoAXE] I CAN’T EVEN SEE IT BREATHING, SO
I DON’T THINK IT’S ALIVE, TO BE HONEST. DO WE NEED TO DO CPR ON IT?
IS THAT HOW IT WORKS? MY APP DOESN’T BREATHE. IT’S NOT ALIVE. IT’S A PIECE OF TECHNOLOGY,
AND WE’RE WAITING FOR IT TO RING. WHAT, DRAW CIRCLES? NOT THAT TYPE OF RING, NO. WE’RE WAITING FOR IT TO MAKE SOUNDS,
TO SAY THAT SOMEBODY’S CALLING ME. CALLING YOU WHAT? CALLING… Y’KNOW WHAT, NEVER MIND. I’M WAITING TO HEAR BACK FROM
THE AGENT FOR OUR CELEBRITY, THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO BE BACK BY NOW,
BUT I HAVEN’T HEARD ANYTHING FROM THEM SO THAT’S WHAT WE’RE WAITING FOR. [RebZ sighs] WELL, WHAT D’YA THINK OF HOLLYWOOD?
IT’S QUITE NICE, ISN’T IT? I’M BORED. THERE’S NOTHING HERE. IT’S ALL GREY. WELL, IT’S ONLY THE HOLLYWOOD BOWL. SO WE GOTTA LOOK AT THE PLATES,
AND THE KNIVES AND FORKS, AND
THE TABLES AND THAT KIND OF STUFF. WELL, CAN WE GO AND DO THAT?
I’M SICK OF WAITING FOR THIS IDIOT. YEAH… YOU MIGHT WANT TO PHONE THE MANAGER. I TRIED THAT LIKE 10 TIMES. HE STILL DIDN’T RESPOND. I DON’T KNOW WHAT HE’S DOING. I TELL YOU WHAT. CELEBRITIES AREN’T WHAT
THEY USED TO BE, ARE THEY? NO, IT USED TO BE SO
MUCH EASIER, DIDN’T IT? YEAH. YOU JUST HAD TO TAKE ‘EM IN FROM THE STREETS, KIDNAP THEM
AND PUT THEM TO RANSOM. DEAD EASY IT WAS. APPARENTLY WE’RE NOT ALLOWED
TO DO THAT ANYMORE, THOUGH.
ALWAYS SPOILING THE FUN. WELL IT’S ONLY BECAUSE WE’RE
NOT IN OUR OWN REALM. IT’S THE FACELESS FEW THAT
CAME UP WITH THAT STUPID THING. STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID. ANYWAY, YES? THAT’S NOT RIGHT, AND
WE DID NOT SAY THAT… I DO NOT CONDONE ANY
OF THOSE ACTIONS. BUT THAT’S WHY WE’RE HERE ALL DAY.
I MEAN, IT’S EVEN DARK OUTSIDE NOW. WE’VE LOST ALL LIGHT! I MEAN, THAT’S USUALLY WHAT
HAPPENS IN A 23-MINUTE DAY. WE LOSE LIGHT ACROSS IT. WE’VE SPENT ALL OF IT WAITING FOR
A CALL FROM THIS AGENT GUY. WE STILL HAVEN’T GOT A CELEBRITY! YEAH, IT’S CRAZY. ALL WE’RE AFTER IS A WRITER. I MEAN, I COULD UNDERSTAND IT IF IT WAS, LIKE, GEORGE CLOONEY. OR: TOM CRUISE. OR: …KENDRICK LAMAR? WHAT FILM’S HE BEEN IN? UH… HE DOESN’T DO MANY FILMS,
BUT HE DOES WRITE A LOT. WE SHOULD’VE GOT A DIFFERENT WRITER! THAT’S PROBABLY IT. SO ANYWAY… YOU DO YOUR THING… AND UH… [inaudible whispering] RebZ:
SOUND GOOD?
USlay:
YEAH. RebZ:
WE’RE WAITING IN THE HOLLYWOOD BOWL.
THIS IS FUN. YEAH. [running footsteps] TOTALLY GONNA GET AWAY WITH THIS!!
I AM I AM I AM!! WOOO!! I DID IT! I’M HERE! I’M HERE. ER… HUH. I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHERE I AM. BUT HE DIDN’T GET ME! ISN’T THAT COOL? WHO ARE YOU? WHO… WHO ARE YOU? WHO ARE YOU? I’M ME. WHO ARE YOU? HOLD ON, HOLD ON.
LET ME TAKE A CLOSER LOOK. OOOOOO-KAY! IT’S HIM! IT’S HIM. YOU’RE THE SCARY GUY. THE SCARY GUY THAT LIVES IN THAT TIN HOUSE. THAT’S REALLY SCARY. YEAH YEAH YEAH, IT’S HIM! IT’S HIM. YOU’RE STILL IT, BY THE WAY. [USlay sighs] YOU MADE IT SAFE, DIDN’T YOU? EH… WHAT’S HE DOING HERE ANYWAY? RebZ:
I DUNNO. I DUNNO WHERE WE ARE, TO BE HONEST. JUST RAN HERE. USlay:
ISN’T THAT THE ANGRY ONE FROM BEFORE?
D’YOU REMEMBER? RebZ:
YEAH, I THINK IT IS. AND, UH, DID YOU BRING THAT STABBING WEAPON? USlay:
NO, I DROPPED IT EARLIER.
YOU MADE ME RUN. RebZ:
IT’S TRUE. THAT IS TRUE. UH… SHALL WE RUN? SHALL WE RUN?
OR DO YOU WANNA TALK TO IT? USlay:
I WONDER IF I POKE IT…
SEE WHAT IT DOES. RebZ:
GIVE A FEW SECONDS. SO, YOU LIVE IN THAT TIN HOUSE, RIGHT? I THINK YOU CALLED IT AN AIR-RAID SHELTER? IS THAT RIGHT?
IS THAT RIGHT?
IS THAT RIGHT? UH… I THINK YOU’RE A BIT CONFUSED. UM… OH, I KNOW…
YOU’RE THINKING OF MY GOD-DAUGHTER. SHE LIVES IN A BIG, BIG MANOR
ON THE EDGE OF TOWN. IN THE COUNTRYSIDE. MADE OUT OF TIN, RIGHT? UH, YES, IT IS, ACTUALLY. SHE’S QUITE ANGRY ABOUT IT, THOUGH. UM, YEAH. I’D STAY AWAY FROM HER.
SHE GETS VERY VERY ANGRY. YEAH, SHE DOES. ‘SHE’. ‘SHE’ DOES. ‘SHE’. ‘SHE’… ‘SHE’? RIGHT? YEAH… YEAH, SHE LOOKS A BIT LIKE ME. WHAT’S… WHY…? WHY D’YOU KEEP ASKING ME THAT? OH, NO. NO REASON AT ALL.
UH… OKAY. MOVING ON. OH YEAH, HE’S FRIENDLY.
VERY FRIENDLY. DOESN’T BITE. UGH!!! WHY DON’T YOU… DEAL WITH HIM. I THINK HE SHOULD BE IN
A CAGE, TO BE HONEST. HM. ACTUALLY, THAT WOULD BE QUITE GOOD
FOR YOU, A CAGE, DON’T YOU THINK? I’VE BEEN BARRED, ONCE OR TWICE. ANYWAY, NONE OF THIS MATTERS. JUST GO EASY. HE’S FRAGILE, YOU CAN TELL. UM… YOU DON’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WRITERS,
DO YOU? WE’RE TRYING TO FIND A WRITER TO WRITE OUR FILM. OUR BIOPIC. ALL ABOUT US. US. JUST US. NO ONE ELSE. JUST US. KNOW ANY WRITERS? AH, I THINK…
YEAH, ‘COURSE I DO! YOU’VE GOT–
Urbo:
THERE YOU GUYS ARE! RebZ:
OH DEAR. OH DEAR, SORRY. Urbo:
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU LEFT ME
THERE ON MY OWN LIKE THAT! YOU TRICKED ME! YOU TRICKED ME INTO THINKING THAT THERE
WAS SOMETHING ACTUALLY OVER THERE AND THERE WASN’T.
I CHECKED. LIKE, 4 TIMES. I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU FELL FOR IT, MYSELF. I THOUGHT HE WAS MEANT TO BE THE STUPID ONE. ME? WELL, I AM PRETTY STUPID, TO BE FAIR. BUT WE HAD STUFF TO DO. WE COULDN’T JUST BE WAITING ALL DAY FOR WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WERE
WAITING FOR, THIS AGENT THING. IT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS, WHERE WE’RE FROM. IT ISN’T! YOU JUST… BASICALLY WHEN THEY RELEASE A FILM, WHERE I’M FROM, IT GOES AROUND BITING EVERYONE. YEAH, THEY’RE VERY VICIOUS, FILMS. VERY VICIOUS. AND THEY’RE ABOUT 75 FOOT TALL,
AND THEY GO AROUND BITING EVERYONE. CRAZY. ‘BOUT THE SAME WHERE YOU’RE FROM, ISN’T IT? NO, OURS ARE ABOUT 2 FEET TALL AND QUITE CUTE.
YOU CAN GIVE THEM A STROKE AND EVERYTHING. REALLY! CRAZY. WHAT? IS EVERYTHING IN YOUR REALM TRYING TO KILL YOU? I MEAN, YOU’VE EVEN GOT FILMS WITH TEETH! HOW DOES THAT EVEN WORK?! I DON’T MAKE THE RULES UP, DO I? IT’S JUST HOW IT IS. I MEAN… IT IS THE THIRD DIMENSION OF HELL. SO CAN’T EXACTLY BE NICE, CAN IT? UNLIKE YOU, WHO’S A TIME AND SPACE ACCIDENT. OKAY… THIS GUY WAS A COMPLETE MISTAKE.
I WAS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT IF I COULD TASTE MEALS AGAIN BY GOING BACK IN TIME. BUT THEN, BY GOING BACK IN TIME,
I CREATED HIS ENTIRE SPECIES. BUT DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT.
ALL I NEED TO DO IS GO BACK AND
STOP MYSELF FROM DOING THAT AND HE’LL BE GONE FOREVER.
IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT? DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT. WE’VE TALKED ABOUT THIS! NOT HAPPENING. ALRIGHT? JUST A LITTLE BIT?
JUST… GONE FOREVER? NO, NO, ‘COS WE’LL HAVE THE
CHARITIES ON OUR CASE, YOU KNOW, THE WHOLE PRO-
UNICORN SLAYER CHARITIES… NO ONE WANTS TO DEAL WITH THEM. ANYWAY, AS YOU CAN SEE, OUR STORY’S
QUITE DRAMATIC, OBVIOUSLY AND WE NEED A DECENT WRITER,
BECAUSE AS YOU CAN TELL, I’M SURE YOU KNOW THIS ALREADY,
WE ARE SO FAMOUS. WE ARE. SUPER FAMOUS. WE. ESPECIALLY US.
ARE REALLY FAMOUS. AND YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW ALL ABOUT US, DON’T YOU?
YOU’VE SEEN US BEFORE. UH… I’M SORRY, GUYS, I’VE NO IDEA WHO… WHO YOU THREE ARE. ARE YOU… REALITY TV STARS?
I…JUST DON’T KNOW. REALITY… THE WHAT? THE WHAT OF WHAT? NO, NO, I’M ME, HE’S HIM,
AND THAT’S THAT GUY. AH, THAT MAKES PERFECT SENSE.
–NO, IT DOESN’T. I STILL
DON’T KNOW WHO YOU ARE. WELL: I’M HIM HE’S HE AND HE’S THAT GUY. AH, HANG ON A SEC! DO I KNOW YOU? YEAH, OF COURSE!
EVERYBODY DOES. OH, YOU’RE THE GUY… DID YOU MOW MY LAWN… LAST SUMMER? …NO. DO I LOOK LIKE A GARDENER? DID YOU HAVE UNICORNS IN THE LAWN? UM… NOT THAT TIME OF YEAR, NO. ACTUALLY, I DO KNOW WHO YOU ARE! OH, YOU’RE THE GUY OUTSIDE THE BUS SHELTER COLLECTING… LOOSE CHANGE? YES! WE RAN OUT OF BUDGET, AND
I NEEDED TO GET A BIT MORE. SO YEAH, THAT WAS ME. HE REMEMBERS ME, LOOK! RebZ:
HOLD ON A SECOND… WE NEEDED THAT BUDGET! THAT’S WHAT WE WERE GONNA PAY OUR WRITER! Y’KNOW? WE NEEDED THAT BUDGET OTHERWISE
WE COULDN’T MAKE OUR FILM. I WAS LOOKING FORWARD TO OUR FILM.
I HAD ALL OF ITS FOOD READY
TO FEED IT WITH A CRANE. GOD, I TELL YA… YOU TAKE ALL OF THAT MONEY ♪ [phone rings]
AND YOU EVEN ASK HIM FOR…!
THAT’S JUST NOT RIGHT! HE’S A FACELESS FEW– WELL,
HE’S GOT A FACE… SO HE’S A ‘FACED FEW’. ♪ [phone continues ringing]
HOW COULD YOU DO THAT? WELL, IN FAIRNESS, YOU WOULDN’T
LET ME BUY THE TANKS. SO I WENT OUT AND FOUND SOMEBODY
AND BOUGHT MYSELF SOME TANKS! HOLD ON, HIS BLACK BOX IS
MAKING WEIRD SOUNDS. CAN YOU SHUT IT UP?
IT’S REALLY ANNOYING. YEAH, GIVE ME TWO SECONDS.
IT’S THE AGENT… THE AGENT FOR THE WRITER WHO
WE’RE SUPPOSED TO BE FINDING. LET ME TALK TO THEM FOR A MOMENT. [RebZ sighs]
ALL DAY. THIS HAS BEEN OUR WHOLE–
CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS? D’YOU KNOW ANY WRITERS? ‘COS WE’LL
ACCEPT ANY WRITER AT THIS POINT. UH, IF YOU’RE REALLY DESPERATE… THEN… NO, I DON’T KNOW ANYONE. SORRY, GUYS. THAT’S CRAZY, MAN. LIKE, I DON’T EVEN
KNOW WHAT WRITING IS, TO BE HONEST. WHAT? OKAY, SO THE PHONE’S COMPLETELY DEAD, IT WAS SOME SORT OF DELETED NUMBER, I GUESS THEIR ENTIRE OFFICE IS CLOSED DOWN. SO I DON’T KNOW HOW I’M GONNA
FIGURE OUT A WAY TO GET ANOTHER
ESTATE AGENT FOR THIS GUY. OH, YOU CAN’T USE ESTATE AGENTS
TO CONTACT CELEBRITIES! THEY’RE FOR BUILDINGS. SURELY YOU KNOW THAT BY NOW? HOLD ON. HOLD ON, HOLD ON. HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON. YOU’VE BEEN PHONING THE
BUILDING’S AGENT ALL DAY? WELL, I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW
BUILDINGS HAD AGENTS, MAN! I MEAN, WHAT’S NEXT, ARE CHAIRS GONNA
HAVE AGENTS? ARE SHIELDS GONNA HAVE AGENTS? WHAT’S GONNA HAPPEN NEXT?! I KNOW RAISING AGENTS. YEAH. YOU DON’T WANNA KNOW
WHAT WE USE THEM FOR. NAH. ANYWAY. TO MAKE ALL OF THIS WORK, WHY DON’T YOU USE YOUR
MAGIC BLACK BOX THERE FIND A PICTURE OF OUR WRITER, ‘COS HE’S LOCAL TO THIS PLACE–
WHICH IS BOTSWANA, RIGHT? YEAH, YEAH. THIS IS MY RESTAURANT IN BOTSWANA. RebZ:
AWESOME. WE’RE IN MY RESTAURANT IN BOTSWANA. WHAT’S A RESTAURANT? UM… YOU DON’T REALLY NEED TO KNOW THAT IF YOU COME TO BOTSWANA. I THINK THAT’S THE NAME OF THE CITY. NOT THE PLACE. WHAT, ‘RESTAURANT’? ‘MY RESTAURANT’. OH, ‘MY RESTAURANT’!
OKAY, COOL. SO WE’RE IN A BOTSWANA IN ‘MY RESTAURANT’. PRETTY MUCH. GREAT. WELL, IT’S GOOD TO KNOW WHERE WE ARE,
‘COS I HAVEN’T GOT A CLUE, EVER. SO… SHOW THAT PHOTO TO OUR FRIEND HERE AND MAYBE YOU WILL FIND OUT WHO
OUR WRITER IS, AND THEN WE CAN PHONE
HIM UP LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE DO. IS IT ‘PHONE’? IS THAT WHAT THE RIGHT WORD IS? WHO KNOWS. WELL YOU KEEP SAYING IT! I DO. YES. WELL, HERE YOU GO. AND THERE– OH! WAIT, NO, NOT THAT ONE… UH… RebZ:
NO ONE NEEDED TO SEE THAT, TO BE HONEST. Urbo:
SORRY ABOUT THAT FOLKS, SAVING
THAT FOR LATER, YOU KNOW ME, EH? THERE YOU GO. I DON’T REALLY KNOW YOU, BUT… AH, YEAH, I KNOW THIS GUY! AWESOME! YEAH… UM… I’M REALLY SORRY, GUYS, BUT… THIS GUY DIED 400 YEARS AGO. WHA- WHA- WHA? HE’S BEEN DEAD FOR OVER 400 YEARS. THAT’S NOT EVEN RECENT. THAT’S NOT EVEN RECENT! THAT’S NOT EVEN, LIKE, THIS MORNING! OKAY. THAT IS NOT MY FAULT. YOU TOLD ME TO GO OUT AND
FIND US A DEAD GOOD WRITER
AND THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I DID. I FOUND A DEAD. GOOD. WRITER. WELL THAT’S ‘COS I SAID WE NEEDED THE BEST! YOU’RE ONLY GONNA GET THE BEST,
IF YOU GET THE DEAD… FAMOUS… WRITERS. WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT
BEING TOO LITERAL WITH HIM? YOU TELL HIM TO FIND A DEAD GOOD WRITER, HE’S GONNA FIND YOU A GOOD WRITER, THAT’S DEAD! OH… OH MAN. THAT’S ON ME, THEN. THAT’S ON ME. UH… CRAZY. SO… I’VE GOT AN IDEA! I’VE GOT AN IDEA. USE YOUR APP IF YOU GET IT BACK–
I THINK HE’S GETTING QUITE
ATTACHED TO YOUR BLACK BOX. Urbo:
YOU GIVE IT BACK RIGHT NOW. RebZ:
YOU GOTTA STOP… HAVE SOME OF YOUR…
WHATEVER THAT IS. UM, SO… YOU KNOW YOU GOT THAT APP ABOUT… BASICALLY WHAT MADE HIM? WHY DON’T YOU GO BACK AROUND 60 MINUTES PRESS THAT BUTTON AND WE CAN CREATE OUR OWN STORY. ALL OF US. HOW ABOUT THAT? YOU CAN EVEN BE IN IT, IF YOU WANT. I THINK I’LL PASS ON THIS. I’VE GOT BUSY RESTAURANTS
TO RUN IN BOTSWANA, SO… BETTER NOT. FAIR ENOUGH. BUT PRESS THAT BUTTON BUTTON BUTTON BUTTON BUTTON AND THEN WE COULD WRITE IT OURSELVES! YEAH! HOW COOL IS THAT? WELL, YOU CAN’T WRITE, SO YOU BASICALLY
WANT ME TO DO ALL THE WORK, AS USUAL. WELL, I CAN JUST SAY, ‘THAT’S WRITE’. THAT’S RIGHT. THAT’S RIGHT. THAT’S RIGHT. THAT’S RIGHT. I’D JUST LIKE TO MENTION THAT
THIS WAS MY FIRST IDEA FROM THE VERY BEGINNING
OF THIS EPISODE 23 MINUTES AGO AND YOU BLEW IT OFF AND DECIDED TO
GO ON YOUR LITTLE ADVENTURE. YEAH, THAT’S RIGHT. THAT’S RIGHT. THAT’S RIGHT. THAT’S RIGHT, ISN’T IT? IT’S WRONG. WELL. GUESS WE’LL SEE YOU ALL 60 MINUTES AGO. BYE-BYE! ♪ [rising tension] ♪ [sting]

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